Day 913: Trump selling plastic straws for $1.50 each to own the libs

Ever-desperate to continue reaping cash from a fanatical and delusional base, Donald Trump — an alleged billionaire — is now selling plastic straws through his campaign website. His straws are intended to be used over “liberal paper straws,” since apparently product composition has political leanings and environmental considerations are funny.

The cost for Trump’s straws is a whopping $15 for a 10 pack (plus shipping and handling). Reusable plastic straws can be found elsewhere for 16 cents apiece. That means Trump is banking on his supporters paying an 837.5% increase in price just to suck.

913 days in, 549 to go

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