Day 404: No, Donald Trump Obviously Would Not Have Run Into Parkland School During Shooting

Monday, at the White House, Donald Trump criticized the police response to the shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School that left 17 students and administrators dead two weeks ago.

He claimed that if he were on site at the time, he would have run into the school, even if he didn’t have a weapon himself, to try to stop the shooting.

This is obviously ridiculous. Few civilians would run into such a situation under any circumstance, much less a weaponless septuagenarian.

Despite all of Trump’s false bravado, he:

• Dodged the Vietnam War by taking five deferments, including one for bone spurs;
• Can’t stand the sight of blood;
• Lacks any sort of selflessness;
• Likely cannot run at all; and
• Is terrified of stairs.

Nobody is a bigger hero in his own mind than Donald Trump. But even his supporters would chalk up yesterday’s claims to straight delusion.

404 days in, 1058 to go

Follow us on Twitter at @TrumpTimer